On Vocabulary

It all started long ago.

You see, I was a geek; a nerd; a big ol' dweeb. Surprised? I know, who'd 'a thunk it? OK, so I'm still a geek; not really a nerd; couldn't really tell you what a dweeb is.

Well, there I was. Short, big ol' glasses (it was the late 70s!), couldn't catch a ball, liked to sing - you get the idea. What was I gonna do? I really liked girls and I had no way of getting their interest. Yeah, I was one of the boys who had his first crush in 1st grade. Her name was Beth - a Jehovah's Witness actually ... well, her mom was, anyway - and she was really cute. So how do I get to know her? What about Jennifer in 2nd grade? Lisa in 3rd and 4th?

To really understand things, you have to know my cousin Matthew. Although I have an older brother, he's as odd as I am and we really always got along. My cousin, Matt, was different, though. He and I are the same age and we often went to the same school. We were as close as brothers - but as opposite as was possible. Those balls I couldn't catch? He threw them.

So, around this time I learned to really enjoy reading. A lot. That's when I made the decision - I'd learn every English word every created. I'd know every single word in the language and be able to use it. You can imagine how many people I annoyed. Words stick with me for a while. It's a process:

1. Hear or read the word. Just the other day I heard a word from a book that Amanda's reading for a recording project.

2. Discuss the word with a bunch of people who may or may not know what it means or how it's used. (We did this at the Elend's house while celebrating Amanda's birthday).

3. Try, but fail, to incorporate word into everyday use. This usually fails because my memory is a bit of a prankster. It actually waits around until it senses that I'd really like to use a particular word or reference a particular person or idea and then pulls the rug out from under me. (Actually, I can't remember the word I heard - seriously.)

4. Over-use the word. You see, once I've forgotten the word a couple of times I'll go re-commit it to memory and start using it right away - you know, so that my mind is used to the word when I really need it.

5. It has entered my personal lexicon; I can now go forth and annoy (wasn't that one of Christ's commandments?).

It's not really my fault. It developed as a defense mechanism. Matt used to make fun of me for always using big words. But I like them. They say a lot in a little space. Obviously, if you read my blog, you know that I have a small cadre of words I can call upon for all uses (really is definitely one of those words - it gets way overused in my life - so do very and so). But every now and then I'll throw in a word not many people know. I'm sure it's tres annoying.

So, if you're ever hangin' around me and hear one of those words, just take it in stride. Or ask me about it. I will then commence boring you with the etymology of a word you probably couldn't care less about.

I still don't think I'm a dweeb, though